Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Hitting a Wall

This post originally appeared on Austin Moms Blog.

Do you ever feel like you’ve spent all of your energy going a million miles an hour, taking care of family, jobs, housework, out-of-town guests, etc? Then you find yourself hitting a wall and not knowing how to move on? Come on, ladies, I can’t be the only one!
I don’t know if it’s the changing of the seasons, knowing that the holidays – and my annual bout of seasonal affective disorder – are just around the corner or what but lately I feel so out of sorts. I lost my mojo, my energy, my willingness to go above and beyond. I don’t know what happened. I’m drained.
My apologies to friends, bosses, blogging cohorts and co-workers for leaving you to deal with my slack.
I’ve tried writing so many times but I end up staring at an empty screen. The ”Drafts” folder on my Blogger profile is kind of pathetic. I don’t know why. I’ve dealt with a lot of emotional things but nothing so earth shattering that all I want to do is curl up on the couch and watch Scandal all day. But all I want to do is curl up on the couch and watch Scandal all day.
Why do I feel so listless? What happened to the creative drive and ambition I used to have? I used to be able to work 10 hours straight, go to happy hour with girlfriends and be home in time for a good conversation with Todd before getting a good night’s sleep. I know that life is in the past  but even after I became a mom, I still had a nicely balanced existence. Now, I’m lucky to make it through a day without pissing anybody off due to my apathy. I don’t even have the passion for writing that I used to have.
Here’s the worst part: I know there are things I can try to do to get better. Like exercise, eat healthy, avoid alcohol, etc. I just don’t do them. I don’t have the energy for a big change but a big change is going to be what makes the difference. Is this my depression rearing its ugly head or is it something that will go away once I find the right outlet?
So I’m asking for help. How do I get my mojo back? More sex? Therapy? Spa treatments? Weekend retreat? Moms Night Out?

1 comment:

  1. Hey Lisa! Do you want to grab lunch sometime? What days are good for you? -maeve