Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Irrational Fears

Does this look like something nightmarish? Bad example?
© Juburg | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos
This morning when I was driving to work, I looked in my rearview mirror and saw a guy on a motorcycle. He was wearing a Skeletor mask.
My first reaction was, "Is he the Angel of Death? Am I going to die today?"
How did I even get there? Shouldn't my initial reaction be, "Only in Austin will you see a guy on a motorcycle wearing a Skeletor mask. I wonder which of my co-workers knows him."
I have weird fears. My mind will just "go there" when confronted something strange.
L.E. sat on my chest one time and put her hands on my neck to give me a hug. I immediately mistook it as her trying to strangle me and she is going to end up a serial killer.
I assure you nothing traumatic happened in my childhood to give me this bizarre paranoia.
Except for the clown.
When I was four, we were at some Halloween party at a big restaurant. I was dressed as a princess. I asked my mom if I could go to the bathroom by myself. She said sure. When I was coming back, someone tapped my shoulder. I turned around and there was a werewolf and a clown. The werewolf was the most terrifying thing I'd ever seen. The clown was guilty by association. My screams were so loud that they almost put the restaurant on lockdown because people assumed I was being abducted.
Ever since then, I'm scared of clowns. All types...Ronald McDonald, Bimbo, Killer Klowns, clown dolls, Jack-in-the-Boxes, etc.
Seeing Poltergeist at age 7 may have contributed to this.
So yes, I have an irrational fear of clowns. And I always assume the worst is going to happen even when it's just a dude dressed as Skeletor. On a motorcycle. In January...
I can't be the only one with a strange fear. Please tell me:
What are your crazy, irrational fears?


  1. Don't feel bad, I don't like clowns either! I think it came from seeing that Stephen King movie IT when I was like 5...

    1. IT messed me up, too. That's why I can't really acknowledge the band Pennywise...

  2. OMG, I could've totally written this post! I saw Poltergeist when I was 8, had a horrible sunburn the same day that caused a high fever with hallucinations. I smacked the crap out of my mom when she was trying to give me Tylenol because I honestly thought she was the old ghost man reaching for me in my bed! Also terrified of clowns. When I was 15, I was at a Culture Fair for school and a 'mime' stalked me to the point that one of the chaperones had to have one of the police officers present escort him out of the event. He returned and followed me to the bus, where the officer again escorted him out, and stayed at the entrance gate to prevent him from returning. I know he wasn't a clown, so to speak, but all the same to me. Face paint, you know. Completely and totally terrifying. I feel your pain.

    1. I think mimes are even creepier than clowns because they don't speak! I can't even imagine being stalked by one. Thank you for not making me feel crazier than normal!